Split Personality Disorder

Here is a statistic you should know about. Watch the video below to learn more.

Book is ready

It is done!

After a year and a half I've finished That Warrior Spirit Book I. It's now available on Lulu.

I'm taking a deep breath here. Is it relief or anticipation? Have I really done the best I could or have I allowed my impatience to get the best of me?

Whatever. It is now out there.

Essential Skills Training

Being the captain of a men's team has proven to be challenging, so I've gone and made my life even more challenging by accepting a role as Event Manager for an upcoming weekend workshop called Essential Skills Training.

I've had a taste of the Essential Skills Training workshop through a couple of conference calls that I've been on. I have found them to be powerful and inspiring, and I've come away with some new tools. With a new year coming around the corner I've started setting goals in place for 2010 using what I've learned so far.

I've identified my top three areas of improvement and have started setting goals in those areas. Some times all these challenges I am taking on feel daunting. But - this is the best time of my life to be taking on these challenges; this is the time of my life to be totally reinventing myself.

Third speech

The Toastmasters chapter that I belong to has a club goal for all members to give at least three speeches. I and one other new member both gave our third speeches tonight.

One feedback I got after giving my second speech last week was to print my notes on a one-pager instead of on multiple index cards. Doing so would free up my hands so I could better express myself and would prevent the danger of dropping my cards and having them all go out of order.

I followed that advice tonight. I still created the index cards to help me memorize my speech and then I typed in my notes from the index cards into a one page document in my word processor. Although I had my one page notes with me at the lectern I did not refer to them. At one point I had to pause to remember where I was supposed to go next but I didn't have to look at my notes. That's a good thing because one of the objectives of Speech #3 is to give it without refering to notes.

My speech #3 is now done and delivered before the end of the year as per the goal I set myself last week. Tonight was our last meeting of the year. Next week we have a Christmas get-together and then we resume our regular meetings in January. My goal for 2010 is to complete the Competent Communicator maual and the Competent Leadership manual. That means giving seven more speeches.

Holiday Showcase

I did my first trade show this weekend at the TBDC Holiday Showcase. I met quite a few people there, mostly the other vendors. I'm growing my network.

Being at the trade show was a lot of stimulation and I sure needed my time after to recover. I don't know if the trade show thing is for me; breakfast networking events such as BNI work better for me despite the early morning start.

I won't write off doing more trade shows just from the one experience, but I'm not going to rush out to do another one too soon either.

Season begins

One of the signs that the Christmas season has started is when I start listening to Trans Siberian Orchestra music. That happened last week when I pulled my Christmas Eve and Other Stories CD off the shelf and started listening to it in my car.

Another sign is when we start rehearsing a new song for the Christmas Eve service. That happened tonight at rehearsal. We started learning a new song (new for us that is), called One King. It's a complex song with key signature changes and time signature changes, and it has a really nice melody. We listened to a CD recording of the song a couple of times to familiarize ourselves with it. If we get can get the show lights and a children's choir, we could do this song like Trans Siberian Orchestra.

My second speech

I gave my second speech at Toastmasters tonight. The title was "This Will Put Fur On Your Chest". Three guesses what that was about and the first and third guesses don't count.

The chapter I belong to has a club goal for every member to give three speeches. I am now two thirds of the way towards that goal. Next week will be our last meeting for the year so if I get my third speech ready for next week then I will have reached that goal.

Some of the feedback I received was:
-good use of humour
-interesting how I personified my cats
-nice conversational style and great storytelling

Instead of reading from my speech like I did for my Icebreaker I had prepared index cards. I made a point on an index card for each paragraph in my speech. The process helped me to memorize my speech. The only time I had to refer to my index cards, the only time that I wasn't sure where I was going next and had to refer to the cards was at the end. I didn't know where I was supposed to go next because I was finished and all I had to do was close it!

The feedback I got about my use of index cards was to write out my points on a single sheet of paper and leave it on the lectern. That would free up my hands so that I express myself better.

I think that I didn't spend any more time preparing for this speech than I did on my Icebreaker, but I did use my prep time differently. Maybe prepping for a speech doesn't have to take as much time as I think it will.

Manuscript sent to proof-reader

I've sent my manuscript to my proof-reader. So, I'm getting closer to the completion of this stage of the book.

In the grand scheme of things, her quote for proof-reading it is not that big, but it's still an out-of-pocket cost that I will incur up front. Do I really, really need to have it proof-read? There can't be that many mistakes in it, can there?

Of course, when I sell my millionth copy the amount will be negligible.

On a different but related topic, I'm realizing that I miss my Palm TX. The Palm m515 that I bought to cover for it works but won't run applications I use such as NoteStudio, DayNotez, and Bonsai. I am missing having NoteStudio on a device that fits in my pocket. I used NoteStudio when I developed the outline for That Warrior Spirit and I found it great for capturing those ideas that occur in the moment and for organizing them.

I've heard about a guy named Chris Short who fixes Palm devices and he has a good reputation so I'm getting in touch with him to find out if he will fix my Palm TX and how much it will cost me to do so. Ouch. Another out of pocket expense?

Re-calibrating my writing plans

I miss writing for my novel, That Warrior Spirit. I worked at it diligently in August and in September and made lots of progress. By the end of September I felt like I needed to re-calibrate my priorities though, and put more focus on my business Pictures That Move. Consequently I didn't reach the target I had hoped to reach in October.

I haven't given up though. I've re-calibrated again. I'm so close to getting that first edition out the door that I can't just leave it hanging where it is and not do something about it. My new target is end of November. I've completed all the manuscript changes that I'm going to make, and I'm going to send it out to my proof-reader this week. All that's left for me to do is write the afterword, design the back cover and get it out to lulu.

My plan is to resume my writing schedule in January to start writing what would have been Chapter 5 in my original outline. Meanwhile I've felt some ideas floating around in my head for another book series to start. I guess it can't hurt to start an outline for that series.

A dog eat biscuit world

That episode last month with the cat food left a bad taste in my mouth for a while (see Roasted almonds). I told Jan that I wouldn't eat cat food anymore. So today she makes a batch of dog biscuits.

She's going to put them in bone-shaped tin containers and sell them.

I decide that I am going to refrain from sampling them. Stay away!

I succeeded. Mostly. Right up until Jan took one and right in front of me she bit into it and ate it. Then she told me how good it was and offered me one. So with some hesitation I finally tried it. She was right! It really was yummy. It's made of sesame and flour and other normal ingredients that one would find in a cookie made for human consumption. Except for chocolate of course.

I ate two before she cut me off.

At dinner, something got caught in her throat and she started coughing and gagging, trying to dislodge it and make it come out. "What's the matter Jan, do you have a hairball?"

Red Rock Nevada video montage

A road trip to Red Rock and a tour of The Strip in Las Vegas are featured in this video montage that my company, Pictures That Move, produced for Men's Divisions International (MDI). The footage was filmed by men attending the MDI Internationals convention in October.

Grand challenges

My men's team, Grand Central, and its parent team South Central have been facing some difficult challenges. Grand Central and our brother team Sub Central have been alternating between meeting as separate teams and meeting as one large team throughout the summer. How has that worked for us?

Apparently not too well. I think that we became too insular, too inwardly focused. I'll be frank - I think we'd been operating at a shitty level. Shitty to the point that coming into the fourth and final quarter of the year we decided to meet jointly as one large team regularly through to the end of the year so that we could build the teams up again, rekindle that old South Central team spirit.

Things are picking up for the large team, South Central, and men have stepped up to lead various projects that will shift us back to being more outward focused. By outward focused I mean we take on things that reach out to the communities around us.

We've also started a 21 Day Challenge program. This program is based on the premise that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. Most of the men have identified a habit that they would like to break and a habit that they would like to replace it with. We're using each other as a support and accountability framework to set ourselves up for success. The habit that I'm working on is tidying up my room. I have piles of clutter in my room and every time I take on the project of tidying it up I get so far and stall. I hope that at the end of this 21 Day Challenge I am really proud of what I've done with my room.

A hard day's night

Many self development and motivational workshops that I've attended over the years teach about the importance of having a purpose or a mission, as something that will motivate me to get out of bed each morning. Well, the thing that motivates me to get out of bed most mornings is my bladder.

When I got up this morning, William the cat was in his usual position by the front door, waiting to be let out. I let him out and then went and did my morning routine in the bathroom, stuff like shower and get dressed. When I went into the kitchen for breakfast, I saw William come in with his let me out body language. Huh? Didn't I already let him out? What was he doing back inside?

I sometimes wonder what he does all day when he goes out. I imagine him going to the office, carrying a briefcase in his mouth. Goodbye William, have a good day at the office. Don't forget your Metropass.

Then I think about the fact that he was named after William Wallace, the character from Braveheart. I get a different image then of what he does when he's out all day. Goodbye William, have fun storming the castle.

What We Learned

One of the pieces of feedback I got when I gave my Ice Breaker speech last week was that my public speaking is already at an advanced level. I attribute that to a combination of experience, of doing two-minute presentations at Twenty First Century Leadership, my community theatre experience, and my experience in MDI presenting the What We Learned segment at the end of Division meetings.

I have been doing What We Learned for about two years as part of my role on the core team as Chief of Staff. This spring I completed as Chief of Staff and stepped down from the core team in order to take on a new role as Team Captain.

By request from the current core team I reprised my performance at last night's Division meeting. The core team had prepared a great meeting and the men who were present gave me a lot of good material to work with for my presentation. I really felt on top of form as I delivered last night.

Yesterday was also my birthday. For anyone who is keeping track, I'm now 45. I've decided to count backwards from now on, so I'm looking forward to turning 44 next year.

At the end of the meeting all the men spontaneously sang Happy Birthday to me. Wow. And they were all in the same key. They sounded like a men's choir. I scanned around the circle to see how many men were present and I counted 44, though there may have been 45.

I like the thought of 45 men singing Happy Birthday to me on my 45th birthday.

Roasted almonds

Was at another Legacy Discovery weekend couple of days ago. How many have I now been part of? Enough to have lost track.

Got home from the event early in the evening on Sunday. Felt like I had missed church, found out about a cell group meeting being held that night at Vern's house, and still had enough energy to get myself out of the house and on my way there.

Grabbed some snacks on the way out. A bowl on the kitchen table, a large round ceramic bowl, full of weird shaped roasted almonds. Or so I thought. My housemates must have gone grocery shopping while I was away. I grabbed a handful and popped them into my mouth as I headed for the door. Munch munch, chew chew, swallow swallow.

It didn't take long to realize that these were not nuts. Nuts have a kind of salty flavor, these did not. They crunched differently than nuts do. They tasted kind of fishy.

Decided to go back into the kitchen for a glass of water to wash down the taste. Then it hit me what these snacks really were. I confirmed my suspicion back in the kitchen when I noticed that the area on the floor were there are normally two bowls was vacant. The two bowls that the cat eats out of. Looked at the kitchen table. Saw two bowls there. One had the dry food to which I had just helped myself. The other was the little bowl with the picture of a cat on it, and contained his wet food. Why these two bowls were on the kitchen table I do not know.

The glass of water didn't help wash away the taste. I got to Vern's house and he offered me a crisp which I accepted. He also offered me ice cream. I declined, he offered again, I accepted. Ate the crisp, ate the ice cream. It helped kill the taste of the cat food. Not for long though. By the time I was on my way home I could feel the after taste again.

I came home and told Jan that those dry roasted almonds on the table had gotten stale.

Ice breaker

I gave my Ice Breaker speech at Toastmasters tonight.

Was I ready for it? No. Was I going to let that stop me? No.

There is something to be said for commitment. There is that quote - Until one is committed, there is hesitancy ... the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.

So as long as I keep telling myself that I'm not ready, I'll continue to be not ready and I'll continue putting off doing it.

Once I commit to doing it though, I'll get as ready as I need to be. Part of my hesitancy to commit to doing my Ice Breaker was thinking "where am I going to find the time to prepare it, with everything I've already got going on?" Well - the other day when I wrote my bio for my web site That Warrior Spirit I realized that this bio was my Ice Breaker. I already had the idea for it, all I had to do was develop it and turn it into a 4-6 minute speech, and that wasn't so hard to do.

Now I didn't spend as much time as I would have liked practicing it and learning it well enough to deliver it without looking at my notes. I thought I was stiff in my delivery and I felt more nervous than I thought I would be - but my evaluators didn't see that. They saw that I was calm and confident. If I came across that way to my audience even with the little preparation time that I put into it then I imagine how high I will soar when I really do put the appropriate amount of time into it.

Updated book cover

As I get closer to my publishing target I have updated the book cover and I've launched a new web site to promote the book. Visit www.thatwarriorspirit.com and let me know what you think.

For a limited time I am offering this book at a reduced price through my online store at www.orest-online.com.

Toastmasters

I officially joined Toastmasters this week. I have been going out to meetings as a guest for the past several months. I've gone to meetings at three different clubs. The first club I went to was just starting up; the meetings had low attendance and were poorly run.

The second club met at a location that was closer to home for me. I went to about three of their meetings. I liked the people there and I was starting to feel at home with them. The only problem for me was that they meet on Thursday nights and that's when I have my worship team rehearsals. That meant that I would attend only on those weeks when rehearsal was cancelled (or skip rehearsal, which I don't want to do too often).

Then I heard about a club that meets on Wednesday nights and they meet at a location that is even more closer to home for me. I went to a couple of their meetings and found that I liked the people there too.

On my second turnout I won a white ribbon for my Table Topics speech. My speech was about the role of duct tape in the mating practices of the Twenty First century, as told from the perspective of a Twenty Fifth century archaeologist. Hee hee.

Time to start working on my Ice Breaker speech.

Finished Chapter 4!

Four weeks ago I committed myself to a writing schedule consisting of two sessions of two hours each. (See Feeding My Spirit). My plan at the time was to alternate sessions between Mission: Dawn and That Warrior Spirit.

After holding to that schedule for a couple of weeks, I realized I was about four sessions away from finishing Chapter 4 of That Warrior Spirit. At the pace I was holding to, it would take four weeks to finish.

So I decided to accelerate my plan. I decided to put Mission: Dawn on the back burner yet again, and focus just on That Warrior Spirit. I also decided to finish it in one week by putting four writing sessions into my schedule instead of just two.

That was last week and I had some challenges holding to my self-imposed schedule but I did my best to adapt and by the end of the week I was just one scene away from finishing Chapter 4.

Or so I thought. I had forgotten that there was another partially developed scene that I still needed to finish. That meant that I was really two scenes away from finishing the chapter.

I am happy to say that as of today I have completed those scenes, and Chapter 4 is now done. Finally!

I'm planning to publish those four chapters as Book 1 of a series, so I will next be focusing my writing energies towards completing the second draft, and getting ready to publish and market the book.

GTD revisited

I've never really developed a consistent system or consistent set of habits for practicing GTD (Getting Things Done).

I've experimented with various applications which I've tried to set up as my trusted GTD system but eventually I fall way behind and I stop using it, or I stop trusting it. As a result I have numerous lists of things to do that I have begun to set up in various partially trusted systems.

Still, I'm attracted to the idea of a trusted system that will help me manage my work flow, keep me organized, be fun to use, and function in a way that works for me.

My most recent discovery is Thinking Rock. One thing that I like about it that differentiates it from other applications that I've tried is that it separates the step of Collecting Thoughts from determining Next Actions. One reason I do not keep up with my GTD process is that I sometimes do not know what my Next Action should be. Then things start piling up in my list and I start ignoring it and just doing what I need to do instead of keeping a system up to date.

Thinking Rock is an open source application so it's free to download and use. I like open source software.

Dancing with life

Almost one month has gone by since I committed myself to putting in two writing sessions a week into my schedule. For the first few weeks I was alternating my two sessions a week between writing Mission: Dawn (Tuesday evening session) and That Warrior Spirit (Saturday morning session). I've been working on Chapter 4 for both books.

This week I rebalanced my focus. I estimated that I was four sessions away from finishing Chapter 4 of That Warrior Spirit. At my previous pace that would have taken me four weeks to finish it. Rebalancing meant I decided to focus solely on That Warrior Spirit. That would cut down my time to finish Chapter 4 from four weeks to two weeks. I decided to be even more aggressive than that and target to complete Chapter 4 this week. That meant having four sessions all in one week.

I scheduled in all four writing sessions and put them into my Palm Pilot. As is often the case, life intruded and started messing with my self-imposed schedule. Well life did a pretty darn good job of intruding. Nevertheless, I danced with life and still managed to squeeze in my writing when I could. The result is that I am now one scene away from finishing Chapter 4.

There is still one day left in the week so I still have a shot at meeting my target.

Uncle Orest!

I had dinner today with J and her brother's children. I met them at the diner in IKEA.

When they saw me their faces lit up and they yelled, "Uncle Orest!"

That was the highlight of my day.

Negotiating tactics

There is an adage about negotiating that says, whoever is the first to name a figure loses.

So how does that work when both sides of a negotiation are following the same adage? It seems to me that it would result in a standoff, with both sides avoiding naming any figures.

It also seems to me that the person who follows this strategy would be playing the game of win-lose rather than the game of win-win. Where is the abundance in that?

It seems to me that if I am going to show up in my life as a leader then there are going to be times when I choose to be the one to take the first steps to move things forward to attain my goals. It won't serve me well if I choose to equate that with losing.

Maybe it's time for a new adage.

City dumps

There is a strike on and garbage is piling up in the parks.

I am disappointed that this is happening in my city.

Feeding my spirit

I have had three different Palm Pilot PDA's over the course of years, and my experience with them has been that they die after about two years of use. I rely heavily on my PDA and I take it with me practically everywhere I go. I use it to keep my schedule and my contact list at my fingertips, and I use it to jot down ideas that I come up with while they're still fresh in my mind.

My previous PDA was a Palm TX. Recently I have noticed that its battery won't hold a charge any more. I would plug it in overnight so it would charge and the next day I would turn it on and it would tell me that the battery level was still low. So I have been without a functioning PDA for some three to four weeks - not good!

Last week I bought a "new" old Palm through craigslist. It's a Palm m515 - a step up from the first unit that I had. It's functional, and it was cheap compared to the cost of today's smart phones.

While I was in the process of syncing it for the first time, I came across some notes and scenes that I had written for Mission: Dawn. I looked over some of them and found that I still liked what I had written.

So I've become all fired up about writing my books again. I started Mission: Dawn four years ago and to date I've got three partially written chapters. I started That Warrior Spirit and to date I've got three completed chapters in first draft form.

Writing a book has been a life-long ambition for me. It goes back to my first visit to the public library when I came away from seeing all those books on display and said, "Wow! When I grow up I'm going to write a book!" (See The Written Word ). Well, maybe I'm not done growing up yet - but why let that stop me!

I sometimes find it hard to justify taking the time to work on one of my books when I have a business to run. For me, writing a book (or more) is something that falls into the quadrant of Important But Not Urgent. I have no deadline pressing me to write. However, by not working on it I'm starting to feel like I'm starving my spirit. Having two incomplete books on my list has become one of my tolerances, and I'm starting to feel like it's sapping my energy.

So here is what I am going to do about it. I'm making it one of my SMART goals. Between now and end of September, I'm putting in two writing sessions a week into my schedule, each session up to two hours, and I'll be using those sessions to advance my progress on both books.

Perspective of a year

What a difference in perspective a year and a half can make. A year and a half ago I broke off my four year relationship with J. I felt frustrated and disappointed, and after I left I felt grief and a sense of loss.

Only half a year before the break up we had travelled together to Vancouver and Seattle to attend the Twenty First Century Leadership workshop. We had both taken lots of pictures and shot lots of video and done lots of journaling during that trip, and I had a vision of bringing all that content together to make a travel videologue. I hadn't got a good start at that project when I broke up with her, and a year and a half ago if I looked at any of the images from that trip I felt depressed. They reminded me of failure.

Today I look at those videos and I remember with pleasure and fondness that trip. I am looking at those videos now because I have decided I will make that documentary after all, as a portfolio project for my business if nothing else.

J and I have become friends again. One of the tenets of leadership that 21CL teaches is that as a leader I tell myself the truth. I frequently ask myself, "What am I pretending not to know?" I know what were our relational dynamics that often led to the fights we had. I know that she behaves in certain ways and I know that I have a choice in how I respond. I know that if I respond in the way I would naturally respond, then that leads to the same kind of friction that neither one of us enjoyed in the past. For me to continue to respond in the same way that I used to is to pretend that I don't know what I really do know, about her and about how we relate.

Seeds or bouquet?

I was flipping through a book that Fede showed me, titled Jesus CEO. One chapter caught my attention. It's titled He Prized the Seed Rather than the Bouquet. The chapter begins by asking the reader this question, "Which would you rather have, a bouquet of flowers or a packet of seeds?" Most people would pick the bouquet. I know that it was the first thing that came to my mind when I read the question, until I thought about it a little more.

After reading the chapter I thought it would be a good exercise to bring to one of my men's team meetings. I've asked Fede to think about coming up with an exercise based on this idea to next week's meeting.

What choices are represented by the packet of seeds? For me, the answer is growth. Inviting guests to our team meetings - those are the seeds.

Breaking the Sales Call barrier

I started making sales calls this week. My goal was to make ten sales calls. What am I selling and to whom? For my current promo campaign I am targeting wedding photographers. I am selling partnership. I am offering my services as a video editor to any wedding photographer who would like to offload their post-production work so that they can spend their time behind their camera instead of their computer.

I have collated a list of almost 500 photography businesses in GTA and have identified that 168 of those claim (or once claimed) to do wedding photography. In theory, if I call each of those 168 businesses I should find someone who will want to do business with me, yes?

I used some of the tricks I learned at my weekend with Tony Robbins (see Walking on fire) to get myself in the right frame of mind. Change my physiology to change my state - sit up straight, don't slouch; smile, look up and not down.

The first call I made was a wrong number and the second call went to an answering machine and it didn't sound like a business. I didn't leave a message. What if my whole list was garbage? What if I spent the time calling each of the 168 prospects and they all turn out to be wrong numbers? Discouragement started creeping up on me.

Well forget that. Next!

On call number three, the guy I spoke with said, "Yeah, we might be interested in outsourcing when we get busy." Great! Now what's my next step?

Do I sound like I was a little under-prepared? Yes. But I needed to start building momentum. I needed to start building my sales muscle. That's why my initial goal was to make only 10 calls out of 168. What did I learn? I felt as much hesitation before making call #10 as I did before making call #1. I thought it was supposed to get easier with practice. So far it hasn't.

Maybe I need to continue building my muscle.

Discovering the writing process

I've completed the first three chapters of the novel I started writing last year, That Warrior Spirit. I am way behind the schedule I set for myself last year but I am determined to get back on track. The idea for this book came to me about a year ago; I spent July and August of last year creating the characters and the outline, and started writing it, probably around September.

In my outline I set it to be eight chapters, so after a year I am almost halfway done.

This weekend I started pre-writing for Chapter 4. This is a new word that I discovered and I've adopted it to describe what I've discovered to be one of the steps in my writing process. I have found that even with a comprehensive outline I am still sometimes challenged to sit down and write a scene. It takes me a while to get into the zone, to connect with the characters and connect with the scene. The step of pre-writing is a step in which I write from stream of consciousness. I keep the language very informal. I just sit down, start asking the characters what they do and write down whatever comes up. Almost always during the pre-writing process I land in the zone, where the ideas, the emotions, and the words just start to flow. Very often all I need to do next to write the scene is to change the language of a pre-write; change it from present tense language into past tense language.

I used to call this step a writing blitz but I saw the term pre-writing in a book about writing and decided to adopt it. The step of pre-writing is similar to the exercise I used to do, writing morning pages, when I was going through The Artist's Way.

Walking on fire

I had an intense and incredible experience at the Tony Robbins program this weekend, Unleash the Power Within. The program went from Thursday to Sunday. The highlight of Thursday was the firewalk. It seems counterintuitive that the firewalk would be on the first night - after all, where do you go after you've done the impossible?

I was impressed by Tony Robbins, I expected that he would put in an appearance for an hour or two and that other speakers would fill the remainder of the program. Surely the promoters were just using his name to sell the program, yes? Well, no. Robbins started around two o'clock on Thursday and he kept on going and going and going. He took no breaks (and gave none either!), and kept going for a good eight hours or so. He has an incredible amount of energy and presence.

The bulk of the program on Thursday was used in preparing the 3,000 participants for the firewalk. The top three tools that he used to reinforce the learning were repetition, repetition, and repetition. For most of the afternoon I did not know whether I would do the firewalk or not. I had various reasons for not doing it, but I also could see clearly what was on the other side for me if I did - I saw the rest if my life on the other side.

I thought about the saying, if you want to walk on water you have to get out of the boat. I stood by and watched other people do the walk. I stood by for quite a while then noticed that I was letting lots of people walk past me and do the walk while I just watched. I finally mustered up my courage and moved into line. Soon I was at the front of the line and it was my turn.

It took about five quick steps and it was over. Woo hoo! I did it! I didn't feel any heat at all during my walk. The sensation I felt was like walking on cool ashes. I felt something peel off the bottoms of my feet after I came out of it. Did I sear the skin on my feet? Were the bottoms of my feet all burned and blackened with layers of skin peeling off?

No. It was just leaves and grass that had stuck to my feet before I did the walk, and were now peeling off. My feet were fine, still white. In fact, the day after they felt like I had just had a great foot massage.

I celebrated my triumph with some of the other participants and I texted a few people to brag about what I'd just done and then I headed back to the convention hall to get my shoes and socks. When I got back to the hall, it seemed that I could tell by the look on people's faces who had done the walk and who had not. I was really glad that I was one of the people who did do it.

The Einstein Effect

Sometimes when I play with GIMP late at night I end up having interesting dreams. In this case, I had a vision. Albert Einstein in a Starfleet uniform, a book cover. Maybe this will be the third book in my Mission: Dawn series (I already got other ideas for book two).

Do not leave popcorn unattended in microwave

A few weeks ago I was playing around in GIMP, the open source graphic image manipulator. I read some tutorials on how to make starfields and nebulas. Tonight I read a tutorial on how to make a planet.

I felt like munching on a snack and I'd already had some ice cream so I found a bag of popcorn and put it in the microwave oven. I don't trust the Popcorn setting and I recall from past experience that 2:30 is about the amount of time that it takes. So I punched in 2:30, hit Start, and went back to my laptop to build my first planet.

Two and a half minutes the microwave beeped. I went back to the kitchen and opened the microwave door. Smoky smoky smoky! There was a nice big burn mark on the paper bag. So 2:30 is too long for this brand of popcorn. But it is enough time to make a decent looking planet.

A Grand team meeting

If any team meeting had the potential to be a totally screwed up meeting it was tonight's meeting (see A Grand new journey). I was burned out all last week and didn't tackle planning the meeting until Sunday night - the night before. Kind of late for delegating major parts of the meeting to other men. So I would need to prepare to lead most of it myself. Add to that half the team being busy and not coming, add to that we met at a location where we had never met before, add to that me being late because I didn't leave the house early enough to get to the site on time, add to that there was only one man there when I arrived...

Despite all that, it was a great meeting for the men who did come. In total we were five men - four members plus one first-time guest. I remained focused on my context, purpose, and results, and on delivering value. My purpose was "having great communication in all relationships", and a couple of results I had were "all men including guests are encouraged to participate" and "men are encouraged to be open with each other". With that in mind, I managed to direct a non-purposeful chit-chat session into a spontaneously developed exercise in which men shared things about themselves and then expressed what they learned about the other men.

What I learned - we don't need to have a large number of men present to have a Grand meeting. Also that I am good at being flexible, adapting my agenda on the fly, generally by listening to and trusting my intuition. It does speak to me when I need it. Although this is a strength that is good to have for producing value under dubious circumstances, I have to be careful not to become too cocky, not to use it as a substitute for planning and preparation.

Oh, by the way, I finally had a chance to say "Make it so" tonight.

A string of wins

I've had a string of recent wins in the past few weeks and I've been so busy and working intensely that I haven't had time to celebrate them until this week.

My successful presentation and completion of Phase III; the completion and delivery of my "Final" business plan; a successful completion of Legacy Discovery weekend as Training Team Manager; the sale of one of my rental properties. These are all some big wins that I've had lately.

Last week was an intense week for me. My business plan was due on Monday and I knew I was going to not have time on the weekend to work on it, so I was scrambling to finish as much of it as possible last week. I handed it in yesterday and went to Booster Juice to treat myself to a smoothie as a celebration.

Today I was in decompression mode. I felt the need to feed my creative side. I spent some time doing the layout for a photobook in Scribus, and in the evening went to High Park with my digital camera to shoot some more pictures. I only took a few before the battery in my camera ran down.

Batteries running down seems to be a theme this week. The battery in my Palm Pilot won't hold a charge for very long anymore, so I may need to look for a replacement soon.

I need to charge up my Palm Pilot, I need to charge up the batteries for my digital camera, and I need to recharge me.

Allergic reaction?

I think I am allergic to Touched By An Angel.

There is a book in the house, it's called In the Words of Angels. It contains “twenty inspiring stories from Touched By An Angel"; it belongs to one of my house mates. I like to read when I'm eating and I often pick up this book and read a couple of stories while I'm having my breakfast or dinner.

With every story that I've read in this book, I've experienced an allergic reaction. My throat constricts, my eyes water, and I feel a peculiar sensation in my heart. Are those not symptoms of an allergy? So far I haven't needed an epinephrine.

Presentation Day

I had my Presentation Day yesterday. What that means is that I handed in the first draft version of my business plan and gave a ten minute presentation to a panel of business people.

I got up early because I still needed to finish printing my business plan. I have it structured as a separate document for each section so I needed to open each document, print it, and put all the sections together. And get it stapled - my stapler won't punch through it because there are too many pages. For my next version I am going to structure it as a master document with sub-documents.

I had set my alarm to go off at 4am so I'd have enough time to do all my last minute preparations in the morning before going off to my 9am presentation.

My alarm went off promptly at 4am and woke me. Anguish! Cruel cruel universe! I did not want to do this - I just went to bed four hours before that!

I finally hauled myself out of bed. Threw the dress shirt I wanted to wear into the dryer with a sheet of Bounce. Bachelor-style dry-cleaning. Went off to take my shower.

It was sooooo nice to be in the shower. Warm. Wet. Comforting. I felt like standing under the falling water for, like, half an hour. I didn't.

I knew I needed to be thinking about my presentation, getting mentally prepared, but I was still processing my thoughts and feelings from the previous day. No time for that! I have a job to do and I need to prepare for it!

By 7:30 I was done printing my business plan and finished collating my handouts. The Executive Summary needs more work but that was all the time I had for it.

I took a moment to update my Facebook status to wish everyone in my OSEB class well with their presentations. My morning magic chuckle - watching the Muppets "Manna manna" video that one of my classmates had linked on her Facebook. Then off to McDonalds for breakfast.

McDonalds - the breakfast of champions. And of busy entrepreneurs.

By 10:47 I was done, presentation, question and answer, feedback and all. Done! It went by quickly; it went well. One of the panelists complemented my presentation skills and said that with the right tools I would have no trouble selling. My three times at Twenty First Century Leadership and my experience on the core team in MDI have paid off; this is where I have practiced my presentation style.

After it was over I went to Booster Juice and treated myself to a celebratory smoothie.

The last ten weeks have gone by quickly. Tomorrow is my last day in Phase III. I have a workshop in the morning, Introduction to Phase IV, and in the afternoon we have our class graduation party. Yipee!

A Grand new journey

Tonight I have completed in my role as member of the core team in my Men's Division. It's been a long journey, of about three and a half years, and it is a journey that I am proud to have taken.

I don't think of it as something that I have completed, so much as something that I have exchanged for a new journey. My new journey is as Captain of a new team in the Division - team Grand Central.

When I joined the Men's Division (MDI), I joined a team called South Central. Team South Central has changed quite a bit since then. It has become a more powerful team, a team of leaders. It has also grown in numbers, to the point where men started talking about splitting the team.

Some men were in favour of splitting the team and some were opposed, but I think that all agreed that an eventual split was inevitable. Thus was born the Intentional Growth strategy - a vision and a plan for South Central to manage its own growth and evolution rather than split in anticipation of becoming too large to be effective.

Out of the Intentional Growth strategy came the idea of operating as two teams that were "separate but connected". This is a unique mode of operation within the Division, but then South Central has developed a team culture of innovating and pioneering.

Grand Central is one of the two "separate" teams that has born out of the growth of South Central, and I am looking forward to my new journey and my new role as Captain of this team.

Business cards ordered

I ordered my Stage 1 business cards on Friday. I'm justa movin', movin', movin', forward.

Decided not to wait to get my business name registered.

I call it Stage 1 - this stage is about the start-up activities that I will take that can be completed quickly and at a low cost. The purpose of this stage is to demonstrate that my business really exists. It's not just a figment of my imagination any more! It's purpose is also to support my initial networking and prospecting activities; in essence, to begin building momentum.

I've set up my business email account too. So far I've completed the first three activities on my Getting started list.

Domain name registered

I had planned to get my first batch of business cards done this week but decided to hold off. Reason being that I found that someone is already using the business name I want to use and the domain name I want to use.

I selected another domain name that I will use instead, and got it registered. I'm thinking about whether I should get my business name registered or not before getting my first batch of business cards done. I learned in class today that registering a business name does not actually protect my business name, it merely identifies me as being the person associated with that name.

So should I register my business name or not? I'll have to register it eventually anyway, so the question really is, how important is it that I register the name before I start printing and handing out my business cards?

Getting started

I find it hard to believe that I'm already in Week 7 of my OSEB Phase III program. I've already submitted two milestone assignments and have one more tomorrow.

The other day, my coach Stew asked me if I had to wait until I graduated from the program to get my business started. I told him that I do not - there are people in my class that have already got a business in some stage of development.

So - what am I waiting for? Do I really need to wait until I complete my business plan before I start doing business? No, I don't need to, and I'm not going to.

I've made a list of start-up activities that I can do that do not have to cost a lot of money or take a lot of time. I call this list Stage 1.

Here is my current list of Stage 1 activities:

• Design and print 250 business cards.


• Register domain name.


• Set up business email account.


• Attend first networking event.


• Complete first Touchstone (portfolio) video (add soundtrack and ending).


• Create initial list of people I want to be in my Mastermind group.

I'm targeting to have my business card design completed by Tuesday.

Practice practice practice

I went to see Avalon at the Queensway Cathedral tonight.

The opening performance was by Jay Calder, a very talented guitarist. He played a very unique style, one in which he provided all of his own accompaniment - all with just one acoustic guitar.

Steve O was there too. During the break he said to me, "I'll have to step down from the worship team now that I've seen him play guitar."

To which I replied, "Forget that, you should just practice more."

Is today Friday?

I had three all-day workshops this week - one on Monday, one on Wednesday, one today (Friday).

The lifestyle I have now is very close to my dream lifestyle, in the sense that I am no longer in the Monday to Friday nine-to-five schedule. However, I am sometimes confused about what day of the week it is. On Wednesday morning when I came to the workshop I was tempted to ask my classmates, "How was your weekend?" I see the same people several times a week and I hadn't seen them the day before (Tuesday) so my mind started telling me that a weekend had just finished.

A similar thing happened at the end of the day on Wednesday. I was tempted to say, "Have a nice weekend" as I left for the day. I knew I wasn't going to see them the next day (Thursday) so my mind started telling me that a weekend was about to begin. Not a bad lifestyle, having a one-day weekend the day before and a one-day weekend the day after.

As I left class at the end of today I realized that I actually could correctly say "Have a nice weekend."

Two deliverables

I had two deliverables due this week that were significant to me. The first deliverable was the completion of the first milestone for Phase III in my OSEB program - Mission Statement and Company Profile. The second deliverable was my participation in the Team Dynamics Training event held by MDI.

I completed my milestone assignment on Thursday evening and handed it in on Friday morning. I took the night off from rehearsal to have more time to complete it.

The Team Dynamics Training event was an all-day event yesterday, Saturday. I think the training went well and I feel good about how I did in my part.

Getting my first milestone completed in my OSEB program and delivering a successful TDT training are my top two accomplishments of this week and both are events worth celebrating.

Mission Statement

My first assignment for the OSEB program is due next week. My assignment is to write the Mission Statement and Company Profile section of my business plan. This is what I have come up with for my mission statement: To create and shape new and better realities.

How well does this work as a mission statement for my business? For it to work it has to be more than a mission statement for my business, it has to be a mission statement for my life.

I've decided to operate under the premise that, whether or not I know my mission statement, I am living it out in my life. So to test this MS I would look at different parts of my life and ask "How does this MS show up in this area of my life?"

How does this MS show up in my music? When I write music, the song that I create becomes a new reality.

How does this MS show up in my writing? When I write for my novel, the characters and situations that I create become a new reality.

How does this MS show up when I participate on the training team for the Legacy Discovery weekend with my men's division? When I train a man or give a man my truth and he makes a different choice and improves his life, then I have shaped a new and better reality.

So I think that my mission statement lines up well with my personal mission and is close to my personal ideology, if not bang on.

OSEB application accepted

I got the word last week. Congratulations! You've been accepted. I'm about to start a new chapter in my life - the OSEB chapter. It's ironic that I got that call because the same morning, perhaps two hours earlier, I had a dream that they told me no.

Friday was contract signing day. I won't say that I've signed my life away, because I have already signed my life away several times. I will say though that I've signed the next 52 weeks of my life away.

Tomorrow is my first day at school.

A new prayer

I have stopped praying for God to find me a wife. Instead I pray for God to make me be the kind of man that a woman would want for a husband.

I have stopped praying for God to give me a family. Instead I pray for God to make me be the kind of man that children would want for a father.

Speed dating

I attended a speed dating event last week. The premise of the event is that an equal number of men and women attend, all pre-screened by age bracket. Each man has three minutes to talk to each woman. At the end of three minutes a bell rings and the man and woman each rate each other on the basis of would they like to see each other again. They rate each other on a scorecard that they turn in to the event organizers at the end of the evening. Where a man and a woman both ranked each other as Yes then the organizers send them each others contact information.

I was apprehensive about going to the event and was not in a great space about it. I even considered not going, but I had already committed to it last month so it wouldn't do to not go. Ninety percent of success is just showing up, right? The eleventh tenet of the leadership covenant - As a leader I never take myself out of the game. If you want to be a champion, fight one more round.

So I went. Three minutes go by very quickly. The premise is that most people know in less than three minutes if there is chemistry. That may be so, but I think that three minutes is not enough to get to know someone.

I did come away from the event feeling good and I enjoyed myself. Time went by so fast that I didn't have time to not enjoy myself.

A couple of days later I got the results back from the organizers and I had no matches. That left me feeling discouraged and wondering if dating is really all about superficialities. Will I do this venue again? I don't know; right now it's a toss up between not wanting to set myself up for disappointment or deciding that it's just a numbers game and keep playing it that way.

Which side of the bed

“Do you still sleep on your side of the bed?” That's a question that Harry Burns asks Sally Albright, in When Harry Met Sally. Harry (Billy Crystal) and Sally (Meg Ryan) meet again after another five years have passed since they last saw each other when they were both involved with other partners. They meet again and their past relationships have since dissolved. “Do you still sleep on your side of the bed?” asks Harry.

It is almost a year since I broke up with J. I still sleep on my side of the bed, the left side. Part of my reason for that is practical. The way my bed is positioned in my room it is natural that I would get in on the left side. Munchkin the cat often sleeps at the foot of my bed, on the right side. I don't know why he likes that side; perhaps because it is close to the window and therefore warmer. Or maybe he just likes the view better. Sometimes when I start to roll over towards the middle and stretch out my legs I end up kicking him.

It's colder on the right side of the bed. When I climb into my bed on the left side and warm it up, I don't usually roll over to the right side, especially this time of year, because that side is cold.

Perhaps another reason I stay on one side of my queen size bed is that I don't want to get used to sleeping on the entire bed and then have to get used to sleeping on only one side when I meet my next partner. I figure it's better to stay used to sleeping on one side only.

My MRI adventure

I had my head examined this morning.

This story goes back to a weekend in the late summer of 2008, maybe early fall, when I was walking in a park and I had a brief spell of double vision. It cleared itself within a few minutes but still, that's one of the symptoms of stroke. I mentioned the episode to a doctor and he suggested I have an MRI done. There must have been a waiting list because my date for the examination finally came up today.

My appointment was for 7:45 this morning. So up I got, dark and early this morning, and away I went to the hospital. The morning drive was easy; the roads were clear, traffic was light, and there was nothing falling out of the sky. No precipitation I mean. Though as far as I know the planes were landing safely.

I had an MRI done once before, on my abdominal area. (No, I wasn't pregnant).

This time it was a bit different. The last time they gave me a couple of glasses of water to drink before the exam. I wondered if this time they would give me a plate of fish to eat (brain food) but they didn't.

The last time they injected a fluid into my body and when it went in I felt this awful warm feeling that felt like I had peed my pants. I hadn't. This time there was no injection, no fluid, and no icky warm sensation.

This time they gave me a grey bulb to squeeze in case of emergency. I had no emergency and I didn't squeeze it. They gave me headphones to block out the sound of the machine and also played music through it.

This time I went head first into the machine. Let me tell you about the machine. At first glance it looks like the Guardian of Forever from the City on the Edge of Forever episode of Star Trek. On second and third glances it still looked like the Guardian of Forever. By fourth glance it looked like a Stargate SG-1.

While the machine was operating I thought it sounded like a washing machine. Maybe I was having my brain washed. Or at least wrung out - it sounded like it was on the spin cycle.

The procedure itself was fairly uneventful. Being how early it still was in the morning and that I was supposed to not move during the process, I closed my eyes and slept through most of it. Once it was done the operator told me that I could go. That was it!

It will be some time before I hear the results, but at least no one can tell me now that I should get my head examined.