Epiphany - inspired to sell

The other night I woke up at two in the morning with a message in my head - Sell your house. The house this message was referring to was the house I lived in before I moved in with J and her mom. I still own this house; I had it rented out to a couple of really good tenants.

These tenants were just over a year through a two year lease. Unfortunately they encountered some financial difficulties and could no longer afford to stay there. I sadly agreed to let them out of the lease, and I listed my house with a rental agent.

I have owed this house for almost nine years and lived in it for almost eight of those years. It was the first house I bought, and I admit to having a emotional attachment to this house.

This voice from within was telling me Sell it. I replied that I didn't want to give up this house, but the voice gently repeated, Consider selling it.

I have learned through my life experiences to pay attention to such messages from within. I started thinking about what would happen if I sold the house, and saw that there were a number of reasons why this idea made sense. I also have a strong intuition that this undertaking will be an important and strategic step towards reaching financial independence, though I don't know exactly how that will happen.

Although losing my tenants is unfortunate, perhaps there is a greater good that will come out of this.

Windows Movie Maker and audio dropouts

I've noticed that some of the video projects I have created with Windows Movie Maker contain dropouts in the audio track. I first noticed this on the DVD's I created in March. At the time, I thought that the reason I was getting those dropouts was because my computer was low on memory so that WMM lacked the resources to render the video file properly. I suspected also that my hard drive was filling up so that there might not have been enough hard drive space for the temporary files.

Since then I have added memory to my computer and I have cleared off some of the large AVI files that were chewing up space on my hard drive. Then I rebuilt the afflicted videos - and found that they still contained audio dropouts. Thus I concluded that lack of resources was not the cause.

I verified that the audio glitches did not originate in the source files I was using. There were no glitches when I previewed my project within WMM. However, when I created an AVI file from my project, I found that the resulting file again contained the glitches. So I have concluded that WMM has some problems with the audio when it creates an AVI file.

Washing machine broken?

I think our washing machine is broken. The reason I think this is that apparently everything we put in it shrinks. My shirts, my pants, they all used to fit me fine but they have all shrunk in the past few months and the only reasonable explanation I can think of is that it must be the washing machine.

My belt has shrunk too, I've noticed. I used to put it on the third notch; now I am using the second or even first notch. I've never put my belt in the washer; it must be all the heat and humidity we've experienced this summer that has caused the leather to contract.

Please Mr. Postman - Dancing mom

It's been a few months since I've worked on a video project - the last time was in March when I created a DVD to give to J's brother and to my parents at Easter (See Slicing salami)

The last few videos I made were effectively slide shows set to music. I was using Windows Movie Maker at that time, and it was not able to use the MOV video files from my digital camera. Since then, I have obtained a new application called ShowBiz. This software came bundled with my DVD burner actually.

ShowBiz has no problem with MOV files. It also lets me do more with effects and transitions. For example, I can chain video effects up to two levels. What this means is that I can combine effects.

I used some footage I shot in April when J's aunt and cousin came to visit. The whole family ended up having a dinner party with dancing and karaoke. I had several scenes that I had shot of J's mom dancing with various people. I split the scenes and spliced them together in a pleasing and entertaining combination, and set as soundtrack the song Please Mr. Postman by The Carpenters. I called this video Dancing mom.

J and her mom were both pleased with my video,and it reminded them of the fun we all had.

GarageBand.com

I have recently discovered a web site called GarageBand that focuses on independent music, and I have finally got around to setting up an account there. I haven't uploaded any tracks yet; I have to review 15 songs by other artists first in order to get an upload credit. I plan to do that over the next week or two.

I've uploaded a picture to my GB account but it is distorted. I uploaded an image of a business card with my name and logo, but my image is rectangular and GB made it square. The conversion process stretched it out vertically which makes it look silly. I'll replace it with an image of one of my CD covers.

After I complete my 15 reviews, I will be able to upload one of my own tracks, and then it will get reviewed by other members. Thus, I will be directly fulfilling one of my goals for 2005: Build and use a peer review network for my songwriting.

Links:
GarageBand website
My artist page on GarageBand

Point Clark - thirty two years to find a lighthouse

When I was about eight years old, I went on a trip to a beach, with my sister, my parents and my cousins with their parents.

That trip happened a long time ago, but there were a few things about it that have stood out in my mind for much of my adult life. One was the lighthouse. I remember seeing it on the left side of the road as we entered the parking area. It was open to the public, with an admission fee. I being who I am wanted to go inside the lighthouse and climb to the top, but my parents wouldn't let me.

The other thing I remember about that trip is losing my blue ball to the lake. The way I remembered it, someone threw the ball and it went into the water. My dad remembers it differently - he says nobody threw the ball into the lake; instead me and my cousin were playing with it when the wind caught it and blew it into the water. However it actually happened, I do remember standing on the beach watching my ball floating away in the water, and none of the adults would go into the water and bring it back for me. I lost my ball that day and was very sad and upset about it.

Throughout much of my adult life I did not know where this beach was but I had come to believe that it was at Point Pelee, and that the lake I remembered was Lake Erie. Those boyhood images remained in my memory and in recent weeks began to draw me. I had to go back to that beach again; I had to see that lighthouse again. Those memories were taking on an obsessive quality - perhaps it was a feature of the mid-life crisis I'm supposed to be having.

A couple of weeks ago I dragged J and her mom out with me to Point Pelee. I was going to find that beach!

I did not. However, I began to realize that perhaps the beach of my memory was not at Point Pelee. There were certain signs that just did not add up. But if not Point Pelee then where was that lighthouse? Did it even exist at all outside my memory?

I did some digging on the internet looking for lighthouses. I found one that suggested a likely location - Point Clark, which is at Lake Huron and not at Lake Erie. I picked the memories of my sister and parents - did they even remember that trip? They did! Everything they recalled about it lent credibility to my new theory about its location. My sister said the name Point Clark resonated with her as soon as I said it - she was sure that was it. She also suggested to me that perhaps I was still trying to get back my ball. Whatever my subconscious motivation might have been, one thing I knew - my inner child was seeking my cooperation. I just had to take him to Point Clark.

I had planned to do some traveling with J along the Lake Huron coastline, so I insisted that we stop at Point Clark along the way. We found Point Clark the town and then with some help we found the site of the lighthouse. I actually stopped to ask someone myself for directions – how serious is that!

Well, we found the lighthouse. It was on the left side of the roadway, just as I remembered it. Naturally I wanted to go up the lighthouse... so up the lighthouse I went! J wasn't up to climbing the 114 steps so she waited in a shady spot on the beach while I paid the admission and took the tour up the tower. The climb was an easy one for me because of all the practice I've had doing the stairs at work in the past few month. I took in the view at the top and also took some pictures before coming back down. It was a little scary coming back down because the stairs were a little steep and there were no handrails at the top two flights.

By the time I came back down, I realized that my sister had been mistaken – I didn't come here because I wanted to get back my ball; I came because I wanted to go up the lighthouse. What a miracle, that an eight year old boy taken on a one-time trip to some beach with a lighthouse would find it again thirty eight years later, return at the age of forty and climb to the top of the lighthouse.

Writing challenge from Incarnations of Immortality

I've been re-reading a book series, Incarnations of Immortality by Piers Anthony. I discovered this series about a decade and a half ago, while on a vacation in Florida with my parents.

On that trip I also recieved inspiration for the concept and words for a song I wrote called Magician's Plea, but that's another story.

Each of the books that make up the Incarnations of Immortality series contains an extensive Author's Note at the end of the novel. In the Author's Note of one of the books that I re-read recently, Piers Anthony discusses his writing schedule. I am, of course, interested in learning how other authors practice their craft. In this particular Note (Book Four, Wielding a Red Sword), Piers Anthony writes An average of two thousand words a day for two months covers a one hundred twenty thousand word novel. Wow, two thousand words a day for sixty days? That sounds like a lot.

Through a bit of experimentation, I have found that it takes me about ninety minutes to two hours to write two thousand words. Writing two thousand words is not the challenge for me; making up two thousand words worth of story at a time - now that is a challenge.

Progression #3

I'm playing with Progression #3 today:
Bb Gm7 F Eb Bb Gm7 F Bb

Just for something different, and because I gotta be me, I decided to do this one in 5/4 time, rather than the more common 4/4, 3/4 or 6/8 time signatures.

In standard 4/4 time, there are four beats to each bar. The first and third beats are accented - major accent on the first and minor accent on the third.

In 5/4 time, there are several ways of accenting the bar. For this exercise, I chose to put major accent on the first note and minor accent on the third. The timing does sound odd to my ear when I play back my demo, and the melody I came up with is suggesting I use a 6/8 time signature instead.

For most of the demos I've made so far for these progressions, I used a Grand Piano sound to play the progression and a Female Aah voice to play the melody. The result so far has been that, although each progression and melody is unique, they all sound similar in tone and style. At some point down the road, I'll have to start experimenting with different combinations of instruments and rhythms to get more variety.

Songwriting exercises revisited

Back in April I had found a book on songwriting. In this book I found a list of chord progressions and an exercise - to write a melody for each progression. (See Songwriting exercise) I dabbled a bit with this exercise, then got really busy at work so I didn't have much creative energy left.

I revisited those exercises this week, and worked on four of the eleven progressions. The effort has helped me deal with that state of lethargy I've been in the past few days.

One progression I particularly like is #4, which is:
G D Em C C Am Bm Em - G D Em C - G Am Bm D G.

I'm not sure what the dashes in the progression mean (I just copied it as written in the book), so I'm making up my own interpretation. I'm interpreting that the dashes separate the verse, chorus, and bridge. I've created a Reason file and so far I've worked on the verse (G D Em C C Am Bm Em).

Even though it's still in rough form, it already sounds very nice. J also likes that one best of the ones I've worked on so far.

Heat wave

It has been so hot for the last several weeks, everyone's lawn is drying up and turning yellow. Let me tell you, it is really freaky driving down the street and seeing all these lawns, even in the park, of yellow grass. Grass is supposed to be green! It feels like an episode of Twilight Zone, or like being on some other planet with alien vegetation.

Adustment, frustration and self-compassion

Having finished my recent work assignment and returned from my vacation to Sault Ste. Marie, I have more time on my hands now. So you might think that with all this extra time I would just go full steam on all the things I couldn't do before for which I was blaming a lack of time.

Logically that makes sense, but my motivation isn't tied into logic these days. I have simply slowed down the pace of my life. I feel too lazy and lethargic to do anything, yet too restless to do nothing. It is a frustrating state of being. I suppose my fear is that this state will continue forever and I will end up wasting my time away, wasting my life away.

Yet, perhaps I need to call upon my self-compassion, and accept that it is okay for me to be in this state in the present moment.

Did you write this about our childhood?

I was speaking on the phone with my sister tonight. She sometimes does graphic design, so I asked her if she could make a polished version of the Mission: Dawn insignia that I designed.

She said she could look at it when she has time, and asked me to email her my design. Well, I've already put a sketch up on the blog I set up for my novel-in-progress, so instead of emailing her a copy, I told her to go online and get it from there. She went to look for it while we were on the phone, and on her way to the relevant page she happened upon a scene I wrote recently called Bright of Sun. She read the first few lines:

"Knock on the door."
"You knock - you're older than me."
"I'm older than you so obey me."
"No! Just because you're older doesn't mean you always tell me what to do!"

When she read this, she asked me if this was supposed to be about me and her. She said it sounded like something I would have said to her!

That's funny. I wasn't consciously drawing on my own childhood when I wrote that dialog. But, come to think of it, that scene just came to me, just popped into my head, one day while I was driving home from work. I really liked that scene too; I liked the bickering between Nesta and Kitoyo. So, maybe my subconscious mind really was drawing on my own childhood when it delivered that scene to me.

Vacation Part 3 - Northern Lights Festival

In the final chapter of our vacation, we drove from Sault Ste. Marie to Sudbury. We didn't have to stop at all once we left Sault Ste. Marie - not for a stop sign, not for a traffic light, not for an accident or for traffic, or refreshments or washroom. Just drove for three straight hours until we reached Sudbury.

We stayed in a dorm room at Laurentian University in Sudbury. J found out about these accomodations when she was researching things to do in Sudbury, and that's when she learned about the Northern Lights Festival. It turned out that the campus accomodation was supposed to be for festival volunteers and performers only, but they gave us a room anyways. "We're not going to turn you away," they said.

Our room was on the second floor. There was one washroom on the second floor, and it was for females only. The men's washroom was on the third floor. Did I mention that I drove for three straight hours without stopping?

In the morning we heard that there was a breakfast at the residence, but we weren't sure whether it was supposed to be just for the volunteers and performers, and we were reluctant to crash it. Then we ran into one of the organizers, who is on the Board of Directors for the festival, and she invited us to the breakfast. So we went.

We met a few performers there. One was a fellow named Yann from a Montreal band named Genticorum. There was also a man we passed by in the hallway and I said hi to him. We later found out he was also a performer.

A shuttle brought us right into the festival grounds so we didn't even have to pay admission. I guess it was a worthwhile tradeoff - trading off a waashroom in our room for admission to this festival.

We watched several performances. During one of them, J recognized that the band leader was the same man we had passed by in the hallway that morning. He introduced the band - I didn't know how to spell it at first, but it sounded like Shaggy Dog. I found out later that the band is called Chakidor.

Chakidor had a really good, lively performance. Their sound was good too - it was clear and you could distinctly hear each instrument, Hey - people don't usually pay attention to the sound guy.

Vacation Part 2 - Touring the Soo

The hotel we were staying at in Sault Ste. Marie is called Water Tower Inn. It is named after a structure that stands in front of the building - it used to be a water tower. It is now defunct - it stands only as a landmark, and no doubt remains in order to justify the hotel's name. I thought it looked like an onion or a garlic; J thinks it looks like a turnip.

The hotel has a really nice pool area. It's part indoor and part outdoor. The outdoor part has a whirlpool but the swimming pool is all indoor. We swam a bit in the pool and then sat in the outdoor whirlpool, then went for breakfast.

We spent the afternoon touring the local attractions. We used the complementary vouchers that came with the package when we reserved our canyon tour.

We visited the Art Gallery of Algoma. There were lots of paintings there by the Group of Seven. There were also wind chimes at the gift shop. Nice ones. There was one called Pachelbel Canon in D. It's supposed to sound like the famous Canon. These chimes have a very sweet sound and an awesome resonance. I liked the Canon chime because it makes me think of the song I used when I made our Christmas DVD (Making Movies).

We also visited the Bushplane Heritage Center, an historic building called Ermitage House, and a museum. J got to play with a flight simulator program at the Bushplane Center. She learned how to take off but missed on the intricacies of a proper landing.

Towards the end of our touring we popped in to a smelly diner, which needed a renovation, for a late lunch.

Vacation Part 1 - Agawa Canyon tour

J and I got on the train, barely in time. It was supposed to be seven minutes from the hotel where we were staying to the train station, but our route was foiled by a section of street being closed for construction.

The first ten minutes or so of the tour was through the backyards of industry in Sault Ste. Marie. Some of the passengers made fun of the view, making fun of the promotional literature which had promised views of "lush" forests. Once we got away from the city, we did enter the forest. It was very, very green. For a large part of the tour, the trees were so high that they obscured a lot of the view. You couldn't see the lake for the trees. Despite that, it was a gorgeous ride, and I really felt like I was seeing a private and intimate part of the country.

At one particularly scenic spot, the train rounded a beautiful, large lake. It was a rare scene where the natural beauty of the land and the front of the train were both visible. I nearly collided with another passenger-photographer at the front of our car as we both jockeyed for position. The other passengers were amused by our little competition.

There were no signs, no traffic lights, no litter, no advertising along the way.

Chandler's day in the park

Our cat Chandler seems to have been not too well lately. He doesn't seem to have his usual appetite, he's been shedding a lot, and sneezing, and lethargic. We took him to a vet to check if there was anything wrong with him.

The vet didn't find anything physically wrong with him, which is a relief. However, we figured that maybe because we've been so busy the last several weeks, maybe he was upset that we haven't been around much. J's mom has been away quite a bit too, so he's been home by himself a lot lately.

Getting Chandler into the car to go to the vet or to the groomer to have his nails clipped has always been a major ordeal. He strongly resists going into his cage. This time, rather than trying to get him into his cage, J wrapped him in a towel and carried him into my car. He didn't resist at all - and J looked like she was carrying a baby. We took him to a nearby park. We were at the park for ten to fifteen minutes - we didn't want to overdo it. J held Chandler the whole time and he was totally relaxed about it; he didn't squirm or try to get away. I think he was happy we were spending time with him.

When it was time to go, J climbed back into my car with him. He went into his cage on the back seat by himself. I think that now he now associates going into the cage with going home.

When he got home, he went to his food bowl and finished it off - his appetite seemed normal. I think Chandler really enjoyed his day in the park.

Thanks for feeding the testers

I finished the work assignment today, that I have been on since February (See My fitness commitment.) Although we hit a few rough spots along the way, it ended well. The rest of the test team took me out for lunch today.

The work load was pretty intense for a while, especially in May, but it lightened up in the last few weeks.

I had started doing the stairs every day at first, but that fell off when things got really busy. I was completely off the stairs for several weeks. Towards the end of the assignment I was doing them sporadically, maybe a couple of times a week. Of course I did them yesterday and today, for the last time.

Given the business relationship that exists between my employer and the client, I am sure I will be back there for another project.

In the meantime, it's time to say So long and thanks for all the timbits.

Dreamin' and screamin'

Every once in a while I have a bad dream and wake myself up screaming. Several months ago, I had such a dream. In my dream, there were intruders in the basement of my house in the middle of the night. I try to shout to scare them off and warn my family of the threat in our house. Of course, my vocal chords are immobilized because I am asleep and I am unable to make a sound. This heightens my fear in the dream and escalates my attempts to shout until I am quite literally screaming at the top of my lungs and I wake up. It was a very unsettling experience.

I had another, similar yet different experience of that on the weekend. This time I did not have a scary dream. I could scarcely remember at all what I'd been dreaming. I had a vague impression that I'd been standing on the sidewalk on the street where my parents live. I had a vague impression that I'd been dealing with some people and that I was upset with them. I had a vague impression that there was something inside me I needed to express. It started as a low pitch in my gut, and it increased in pitch and in volume as the scream rose up through my chest, through my throat, and out my mouth. That's about when I woke up.

There is something inside my subconscious that is trying to get out.

Reason, automation, and Matrix

I have figured out how to record automation in Reason. It was pretty intuitive how to do it - just a matter of spending a little bit of time fiddling around.

I used a component called Matrix Pattern Sequencer. Matrix itself does not make any sounds. Instead, you use it to define a pattern, which is a sequence of notes to play. Matrix then sends the appropriate note information to another component, such as the Subtractor Synth, which generates the sound.

Matrix has four banks, named A through D. Each bank can contain up to eight distinct patterns, numbered 1 through 8. Thus there can be up to thirty two distinct patterns, from A1 to D8.


For the Painted Smiles intro, I used three patterns, A1, A2 and A3. By recording automation for the pattern selector, I was able to have Matrix play the required pattern at the appropriate position within the song.

While playing around, I had an idea for an alternate chord progression for Verse 1. I don't know which chord progression to use for my demo - my next step will be to make a mini-demo using each one and decide which one I will stick to.

Starting Chapter 2 - Mission: Dawn

I've decided not to let the fact that I haven't finished Chapter 1 stop me from starting Chapter 2.

My objective for Chapter 1 was to introduce the story, introduce the characters, introduce the ship.

My objective for Chapter 2 is to introduce Planet 542 - show us the world, show its inhabitants, how they see themselves, how they see the world around them. Show what all that is like before the unintentional interference from Dawn occurs.

Chapter 2 is also where I plan to introduce Dr. Tsui, and explore the interactions between the characters we've already met in Chapter 1.