Pivotal moments

Tonight at my men's team meeting, we were led through an exercise in which we were asked to think about a time when someone said something to us that altered the course of our life.

One such experience that came up for me was when I was still in university. I had completed my first year in an Arts program and I was dissatisfied. I recalled that in my final year at high school I had really put myself to it and did really well in my Math classes. I often stayed up until three in the morning studying for my Math tests and I got 80s and 90s on my tests. In my first year in Arts I would sometimes stay up until three working on an assignment and only get a C. When I was in Math my marks were proportional to the amount of effort I put into my assignments and tests. In Arts, my marks seemed completely arbitrary. I started to think about transferring to a Math program.

I made some inquiries and learned that I could transfer to the Math department. However, I hadn't earned enough transfer credits in my Arts program. This meant that I would have to start over at Year One if I were to transfer - and graduate a year later than if I stayed in Arts. Should I do it or not? I had the summer to decide.

One night I was at a weekend long beach party up in cottage country. I met a girl on the beach at night and we chatted away. I mentioned to her the decision I was facing, that would mean delay my graduation by a year and cause me to graduate later than my peers. She said, "When you're forty and doing what you want, that one year won't matter."

I took her point and decided then and there that I would do it, transfer into Math. As for falling behind my peers, I realized I would meet a new set of peers. The girl's comment to me that night on the beach encouraged me to make a decision that affected the rest of my adult life. I know too, with the benefit of hindsight, that I made the right choice. She was right - I am in my forties now and it doesn't matter that I took an extra year to finish school.